Disturbance in the Force: My adolescent crush on Mark Hamill


By Scott Ross

For a 17 year-old slowly coming to terms with his sexuality, Mark Hamill’s presence on screen in Star Wars provided some rather sweet, projected puppy-love.

Mark Hamill - 16 Magazine

Hamill’s appeal came via a mix of elements: His strong, dimpled chin contrasted with his boyish cuteness and short stature (the latter always a strong attraction for me, as was his slight overbite.) In his mid-20s, as he was when Star Wars was filmed, Hamill could still pass nicely for a young man in his late adolescence. The chief quality of his performance in the movie is a brash, youthfully naïve enthusiasm, but there is a buried gravitas in his acting that made him exceptionally effective as Luke Skywalker yet lent him a vulnerability that made you want to take him in your arms and comfort him. (Luke goes through a lot of loss in two hours’ screen time.)

Star Wars - Ben's death

There are moments in the movie, such as the one below, during the binary sunset on Tatooine in which Luke’s face reveals his longing for another life, where George Lucas presents Hamill almost as a fetishized object of breathtaking beauty.

Star Wars - Sunset

Hamill’s face held a classical quality. The nose, in that pre-auto accident period, was aquiline, the lips sensual, the cheekbones chiseled. The mop of fine, but thick, sandy hair completed the image.

Star Wars - Ceremony

In his boy-next-door way, Hamill projected strong erotic/romantic appeal to a love-starved teenage boy wrestling with what he had long suspected about himself but was only now beginning to acknowledge, accept and, ultimately, embrace. He was surprisingly sexy.

Star Wars - Hamill

After the accident (January, 1977 – well before Star Wars was released) the nose was blunter, a bit pug-like. And, of course, Hamill’s face was aging, as it naturally would during the period of years between Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back. But the eyes were still the same, bright and inviting and remarkably deep.

Mark Hamill - eyes

During his preparation for the rigors of Empire, Hamill’s physique filled out nicely. He was no Swarzenegger, thank heaven, but his upper body was now more pleasantly muscular.

The Empire Strikes Back - Yoda and Hamill

One of the strongest memories Hamill held for me in Empire, and which I am more than a little astonished I cannot find a good photo to represent in this age of seemingly endless cyber-sexuality, was how perfectly his small but arousingly well-shaped bottom fit into those tight trousers he wore on Degobah while training with Yoda. Oh, well. The on-set picture below will have to suffice. It gives a reasonably good representation of Hamill’s pert, curved gluteus maximus.

The Empire Strikes Back - Hamill and Guinness on set

At a romantic 17, Hamill’s Luke was a boy I just wanted to hold; at a hornier 19, he had become a young man I wanted… for other things.

Mark Hamill - check shirt

Text copyright 2013 by Scott Ross

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s